From being ‘my new job’ to ‘my great job’ to ‘my life is great job’ to ‘I don’t like it any more job’ to ‘sick and tired job’ today having completed a full circle it finally became my ‘ex-job’. I have had farewells before, in school, college, previous jobs but one heck of a memorable and emotional farewell it was today.
All because of ‘Manoj’ one of my team member. I still remember the day he joined office. A fair, lean and shy guy of around 24-25 (which turned out to be 28) with a permanent smile on his face. For quite some time I didn’t see him speak or mix up with any body much. I wasn’t keeping a check on his work either. He was put in the other teams, then to another and to another.
After all the 3 other team leaders has given up on him, “Manoj cannot survive, No hope”, our group leader called him to ask what was happening, “how exactly do you plan to work here Manoj? Where are we or you going wrong?
In reply Manoj blamed it all on the team leaders and proposed my name as his choice of team leader. He has a strange innocence coupled with conviction in his mannerisms. GL gave him his choice.
Since then the professional relationship and personal relationship has been intertwined so much and it has been a roller coaster ride. There have been times when I have totally freaked out on him, yelled at him, have felt like almost putting across the GL that “Manoj cannot survive” but resisted only because I cant give up.
He, on the other hand has always been smiling bearing all the brunt. Always telling me what an inspiration I am for him, how much has he been learning from me and all that jazz. He put me up on a pedestal and kept raising it higher and higher. Strange enough personally we became thick friends. I mean he shared a lot of his mind and heart with me but I seldom did, I still don’t share any thing with him. I am mostly a listener. Ever since I have given the notice, he has been so exited with my farewell party “leader dekhna ab tak ka best party hoga, sab dekhte reh jayenge” that’s something which is very important to him. Everything about me should be the best he has to prove it to the office, the management that his leader is the best. I remember all those times when I was having it rough it was him who couldn’t eat or sleep, he would develop strategies to make things better for me. All through my bad days he has stood by me, he has told it this other guy “tomorrow even if the GL is against her I shall still stand by her” Today, in the farewell he was asked to say a few words to me (he being so close to me which everyone knows). His voice was choking and trembling, his eyes were moist, “ if there’s any point of saturation in this office for me that is this point, when sanjukta steps out of the office.” That’s all he could say, but he said it all. Back at his desk, I saw tears rolling down his cheeks. Every other guy tried to console him, piya came and told me “I guess he is in love with you”. I knew the answer to this but I kept quiet. Its not love. I mean it is Love but not romance. “duniya mein sirf ek hi rishta nahi hota hai, yeh log is baat ko samajhte kyon nahi hai” he said in the evening, when I told him what piya was thinking. True. I don’t know what to name it, not friendship not love but its one of the most beautiful ones. Never before in my entire life did any body cry for me. I wish I could pay him back with my own tears but I had none. I never do, I only cry in the privacy of my bedroom.
I didn’t know he was this attached to me. I don’t know how to thank him enough…he would sure hold a special place in my heart…but I may never fully be able to tell him how overwhelmed I am.
The new place is a stock broking firm and I don’t know the a b c of stocks and shares… I just hope I pull it through. But before that I am going on the trekking expedition tomorrow, my first ever, 11 days…again I hope I pull it through…