Disclaimer: The word ‘You’ in the following lines is an assortment of many and not representing ME


…You admire a guy for the person he is, things he says or does, but you don’t think you can date him coz he is kinda out of your reach and you also don’t know how he feels for you although you have been very vocal about your crush. [you guys have not met each other in real but you meet everyday on Gtalk and he sure does likes talking to you and the conversation always goes great. He also says conversation is the key to a relationship. True, He is out of your league so no point trying but they also say nothing ventured, nothing gain. He is a divorcee.]


You have an admirer who thinks you have an amazingly sharp brain and have probably read a shelf full to gain all that wisdom and intellect that is reflected in your Blog, he wants you to be a part of his life in some way or the other, you also quite like this guy there is something very romantic about him… [You haven’t met this guy either but he calls often, and have gone to the extent of saying I love you on yahoo messenger. He is 5 years younger to you]


You have someone in your radar who is the most suitable guy when it comes to thinking of marriage.  You are aware of his little, but not completely insignificant, feelings for you and you think if you put enough efforts you can get him convinced for marriage… some thing your mom is pestering you to do everyday… [You guys have been colleagues for some moths. You don’t admire him neither do you think he is the best guy around but both of you are 30 something single in search of some one to tie the knot, both never been into relationship, both come from similar family and educational background. Your parents think he is somebody within your reach in all aspects. You also won’t have parents in law if you marry him]


You have some one who fell head over heels in love with you just by seeing your orkut profile followed by your blog. He surprises you every now and then by saying things you have written about yourself on your blog, “Wow, how much has this guy read” you ask. He has read all those post you wrote straight from your heart hoping some day some one would read them and feel for you. He says he loves you and wants to have a relationship which might be worked towards marriage… [You haven’t met him either but he is visiting your city soon just to see you. It took 2 days for him to fall in love with you which completely freaks out the rationals, the cynics and the critiques and they all are of the opinion that he just wants a good fuck and nothing more than that]


Now listen to me, this is what you do.


First, Let admiration be at its place. You stay as a mystery woman for your admirer, and let your mystery man be in mystery. Don’t get real with the admirer and admiree. Truth is bitter we all know.


Second, The husband material needs a lot of efforts, question is why should you put efforts. Life mein fight pehele kuch kam hai kya…why take more fight trying to work out something where there is no spark. All efforts, just coz chances of marriage is brighter in this case? Marriage. Weird term. And what if you fail. Naah, not worth the effort. Also not good for your ego.


Finally, the cynics could be right (although by definition they never are), the one who is professing his love endlessly probably IS looking for a good fuck, but so what? He is at least sincere enough to walk that extra mile to induce love, emotions and all that jazz before he seeks that universal pleasure we all are seeking.


What on earth should stop you from meeting up and going ahead with a relationship with this guy when all he is trying to do is make you happy, say the nicest of things to you, ready to give all his time and attention to you, some thing you have always longed for, some one to call at the end of the day, some one to share your likes and dislikes etc. He may not be true but you got nothing much to loose here.


And so it goes…


Claimer: I just lied in the opening line. I shouldn’t do that. I call this page “This is my truth”.  The above guys are all people in my life all existing at the same time.


6 thoughts on “So what do you do, when

  1. One of the best pages I have read in a while..

    Thanks for sharing this insight !!!

    What would women do with guys who really like them, but are not the ones who will commit for life? And yes being physical ( i would not say it just a mere good fuck) is on the agenda?


  2. Hey, I really like your blog, but I just wanted to know one thing, not so much because of the interest I hold of people’s personal lives, but just something that pops up in a rational mind every now and then, but then again, this is the only post that prompts me to ask that question.

    You’re a blogger. And people like your blog, and obviously so do the people involved in this post. So it seems you’re balancing out the pros and cons of each of these individuals in your life. But then again, I’ve also observed, that the balancing that you’ve done, explicitly clear after your ‘situation analysis’ is only a certain laudation towards these people for the role you’ve observed of them in your life. My question is, is this positive criticism stemming from the fact that you truly, actually hold these honest opinions, or is it because, these people who love you, also read your blog, and you don’t want them to be offended, whilst offering your conclusion as to what you would do with each of these individuals? Is the criticism constructive, or honest?


  3. Dear Govardhan,

    Very interesting and insightful question, sadly a bit irrelevant. Because in the last line, I said the truth. These situations were all about me. I am not giving these advices to anybody else but to myself.


  4. No, I never misunderstood that part. I just asked you that did you also ‘praise’ these people in addition to deciding what role they’ll obverse in your life, because even they might read this post and you don’t want them to get the wrong idea, or you know, get offended, or is this only honest opinion?

    Also, I came across this blog googling a random search about ‘life in Bangalore’. And it was one of the first returns. Great work, I guess giving advices to yourself earns you admirers on the way too! Good going!


  5. Oh ok, I think now I understood your question better. Actually I didn’t think these people will read this post. Since I know these people I sort of know that they are not regular readers or that they don’t read every post I write. But your observation is very true, I never really thought about this question, “what if they read, how would they feel about it then?”

    In fact who knows they might have even read and didn’t tell me. But since I call this page This is My truth, I intend to give my most honest thoughts, here I say things that I wouldn’t otherwise say face to face. Reading this blog is like reading my mind. Sometimes in real life I might not say the truth, if you asked me about something. But here I will write my honest opinion about it. And mostly I don’t care about how people take these truth.

    That said, there are some things so sensitive which might really hurt someone badly that I wouldn’t even say here. Those I don’t write. I have my secret diary for those thoughts :)


  6. Fair enough. I guess that’s the essential difference between a diary and a blog. You have to strike a balance somewhere!


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