I don’t know if its a coincidence or not but I happen to write whenever it pours unexpectedly and beautifully in the National Capital. And these writings always come in mind while I am coming home from work. In 2005, I used to work in Nehru Place, I thought of this post while sitting in the auto. In 2006 I was stuck in a bus stop, unable to find any bus or auto to my home in Dwarka, the rain was so beautiful I took some impromptu photos.

Today it rained again. I had just taken the car out of our office parking drove for a few meters and hit the Nehru Place crossing. They played a song from the latest Shah Rukh Khan movie My Name is Khan, and I smiled. I felt an air of romance. Perhaps because all day today I have been doing something cute, something I didn’t do in a long time, chatting with this person I met on Twitter. And the paagal stupid mann which never stopped dreaming found some weird reason to smile at itself. This meeting someone, talking to him, knowing him bit by bit, there is a special kind of bliss in doing this.

We are romantics, we meet someone and the first thing we think is of romance. But it has been a while I did that. Over the last 3-4 years I stopped meeting people unless I had some work with them. I didn’t date anybody in the last 3 years. Bangalore kept me busy, gave me enough friends, activities, eat outs, parties and a very steady no strings attached relationship. It was a relationship but we didn’t really date. So the soul mate search took a back seat.

Now back in Delhi I feel lonely again. So what do we do when we are lonely. We search, for romance. So this me, who had stopped going out, spoke to someone after a long time, albeit virtually.

Now in our age, there are just about 3 kinds of romance that we may possibly look for. First, you bump into this nice cute guy by some work of fate and then you get to know each other more and fall in love. Case in point, any Rajshree movie.

Second, you meet this really young guy, very passionate and poignant, different from the world, may be 7-8 years younger to you, who is awestruck by your personality, your independence your courage and strength and eventually falls in love. You of course reject his love in a very proud and elegant fashion like Dimple Kapadia turned down Akshay Khanna in Dil Chahta Hai.

Third, you meet your soul-mate in the most unprepared moment of your life, in your shabbiest best, in that most ridiculous hair do and that pale makeup-less face driving home after a bad day at work, right then this pot bellied bald middle aged man bangs your car or comes in your way unexpectedly. You probably throw some F word at him and drive away without even realizing that was your soul mate. Remember Dianne Keaton and Jack Nicholson in ‘Something Gotta Give’?

But those of us who are romantics, we think, as we drive back, could that be my soulmate. At least I do. And you know what, that’s what keeps me going. I have met thousands of them at all the odd moments of my life, none of them turned out to be my soul mate but I never stopped dreaming. First there is the search, then there is the chase, then the pain and the poetry leading you back to the search again.

Today, as I drove through the maddening traffic soaked in Delhi rains and as the music played on the radio I said hello to the chase. The air of romance thickened when I took the roads through the dark secluded woods of JNU, which actually looks like a scene straight out of a Hitchcock movie. Amidst all the mist and the silence I pulled my car over and asked myself, given a choice between the search, the chase and the soul mate, what will I chose?

A lightening struck behind the woods, a rain soaked dog howled and the answer flashed in front of my eyes. The ‘search’ followed by the ‘chase’ but NEVER the ‘soul mate’. Because if I find and keep him, that will be the death of romance as I know it.

We are the romantics we live to fall in love a hundred times with hundreds of the soul mates.


24 thoughts on “The search, the chase and the soulmate

  1. beautifully written. i, too, am a hopeless romantic — to the point where i’m convinced no person will ever meet my lofty bollywood-deluded ideals — so i just leave it to art to seduce me.


  2. Hmmm! and abit more Hmmmm! then a bit of Silent pause and then… (yes u guess it right – more Hmmmm!)

    just one thought – ever tried rising in love instead of falling in love? Is it required that love will always make you fall? cant it raise you too?


  3. Rains do bring out the romantic in everyone. It is the legacy of Raj Kapoor films.

    So the guy whose car you banged could have been your soulmate? Pursued him too kya?


  4. Leena, thanks! You never know may be somebody will, have faith in Bollywood :P


    Now now please elaborate the Hmms and the pauses :)

    @sum1 No, didn’t pursue, if he is the soul mate, we will meet again.


  5. well written post.
    in the end after the lightning (immediately) i thot u adopted the lonely rain soaked dog as a pet :p

    last line was unexpected ;)


  6. I know the feeling…..when i met nid for the first time we had a ego fight and then second we were doing a project together and now we are married for 5 years…..

    None of us ran after the other…….it just happened….


  7. rain drop tears was waiting for the rain to come and take her away into the stream to noware… when rain came and took her away to the ocean… she overjoyed! she never knew there were lot may rain drop tears came along to make the stream…

    …little boy took her in his tiny hand.. motherhood poured more rain drops of joy!!


  8. very well written. After a long time I am reading the “true Sanju”; a diehard romantic. I feel romantics never have a soulmate becuase once they meet their soulmate the chase will be over and the romantic will die so to keep the romantic alive the soulmate shall never be found even if he is standing right infront of you.


  9. Oh yes and I agree completely with your last para…:-) Romantics will keep falling in love with hundreds of soulmates, they will break a few hearts and many will break theirs.


  10. very nicely put Sanju. the elusive romance always allures a romantic and hence the chase. The soulmate, yes needs a lot of self introspection than judging the other person…but then again (you know this bit) its fun chasing and discovering. Have fun dearest and wait till your heart sings differently :)


  11. Honesty at it’s best. Things which have been described is not something unusual to me however it’s pretty mysterious :)

    A Nice toast for the Hidden treasures and sweet pleasure !


  12. I really liked this.you moved me and made me smile.I can relate to it.You write good.keep writing!:)


  13. I loved your writing, it was refreshing to read about romance as a trait in a person rather than in a relationship.

    I disagree with this though

    if I find and keep him, that will be the death of romance as I know it.

    I don’t believe in soulmates, but there is plenty of romance in a loving, respectful relationship between imperfect people. Bollywood has probably ruined this idea though.


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