After every celebrity suicide, the public discourse gets abuzz with issues of mental health, peace, happiness. Most commonly heard motivational quote is that money, name, fame, success cannot bring you happiness. How true is this? What brings you happiness then?
Happiness is an intangible thing or an abstract idea that we all seek but what ‘happiness’ is varies from person to person. We create our own definition or meaning of happiness according to our circumstances and realities. Happiness being intangible it can only be derived from something else. We think we will be happy when we achieve so and so things, like name, fame, money, car, house, true love, marriage, children etc. Everything we do in life is to achieve those things which we think will make us happy, but when we get them, we might still feel incomplete, unsatisfied and then seek more things. This is an endless cycle, we keep seeking, keep achieving never to be fully satisfied.
But that’s ok. There is nothing wrong in this endless search or pursuit of happiness.
Happiness by itself is a meaningless elusive goal. You cannot ever fully achieve happiness, you will always be halfway to happiness, somewhat happy. And that is a good thing, it would keep giving you a reason to live.
Life is about the pursuit of happiness or that process of chasing those goals which you think will make you happy. In that pursuit lies your dreams, desires, ambitions. It is your source of creativity, you meet new people, forge relationships of all kinds, you build something for yourself and the people you love. This chase can sometimes be tiring, and other times it can be very fulfilling. Sometimes you’ll feel happy that what you wanted you found. Sometimes you’ll be sad. Sometimes you will achieve only some of the things you sought, and you will keep walking, keep searching.
What about Spirituality? The search for Eternal Happiness?
Spiritual Gurus and Philosophers will say you stop chasing happiness in something outside, you have to look within yourself for eternal happiness. But will you tell a hungry person to stop looking for food and search within? And suppose you found that eternal happiness, what would you do with it? Where would you put it? Would you frame it and hang it on the wall and stare at it for the rest of your life?
Pursuit of happiness is our life force, it is that hunger and passion for life that makes us keep going against all odds. The day you feel there is no more hunger left, there is nothing to seek or desire anymore, what would be the point of living?
Life is about the chase, never the destination. It is why 15 years ago when I started writing this blog, I gave it a tag line was, “Dream, desire, hope, expectations, a touch a kiss, a long road, a destination unknown. My life is all about the journey, the destination obviously is death. I will keep living till the last day of my life.
However, the journey can be treacherous and a roller coaster ride, a mix of good days and bad days and we have to learn to cope and survive the bad days. The best coping mechanism is to talk about your inner most feelings. Suppressed pain, anger, frustrations are fatal. We often don’t speak up, don’t call out those who hurt us for fear of losing jobs, relationships, fear of burning bridges. But to cope through the bad days in life journey, we have to learn to get rid of this fear, and start respecting your own desires and emotions. Not suppress them.
This is why I write about my life, my heartbreaks. And I also write about my talent, my achievements.