Man Sent Me Photos Of His Dick – What Happened Next?

That was not a click bait using a shocking headline. A man really did send me photos of his manhood last night.

I have met this man just once in my life in 2011. It was a casual date and we had sex. The date was at his place so I already knew what it ‘really’ was and I just wanted to have some fun. I never met him again but we’ve been connected on social media, and over the last five years he has given me hundreds of booty calls some of which I found amusing, some boring, but none offensive. On my part I have been flirtatious but I was always clear in my head that I don’t want to meet him again. I last WhatsApped him in Jan this year, around my birthday when I was getting worked up about not having enough sex in life. Continue reading “Man Sent Me Photos Of His Dick – What Happened Next?”

Porn ban in India – mainstreaming of women’s lack of sexual agency

Approximately 800+ pornographic websites suddenly went off the internet in India. There were no prior announcement, discussion, no legal basis to the decision. But that’s not to say it is entirely thoughtless, hell no. The great thought behind is that a ban on porn is going to put an end to rapes in this country.Versace--woman and naked man--various women's 90s

Continue reading “Porn ban in India – mainstreaming of women’s lack of sexual agency”

Image from BBC

What is a Sacred Indian Marriage and how Marital Rape may destroy it

Some idiot from the BJP Government recently said that government has no intentions of making marital rape (rape of wife by husband) a criminal offense because marriage in India is so bloody sacred. Oh no, it is not some loony like Saskhi Maharaj making a passing reference at some random event, this is a Minister of State standing inside the Rajya Sabha giving a written reply to a question raised by DMK MP Kanimozhi. Continue reading “What is a Sacred Indian Marriage and how Marital Rape may destroy it”

Vogue empower Sticky post

Vogue Empower My Choice: What the criticism actually did to feminism

Update dt 5-Apr-2015: This blog has gone viral, reaching a total of 2.20 lac people through Facebook, over 70,000 page views and over 10,000 Shares. I’ve been blogging for 10 years, and this week all records broke when it received 32,541 page views on a single day. That’s 22 page views every minute. Thank you everybody who shared this post and made it a viral. Special mention of film maker Anurag Kashyap and actor Atul Kulkarni both shared the link on their Facebook pages.

The Vogue Empower video titled ‘My Choice’ featuring Deepika Padukone and 99 other women, from different walks of life, has already taken way too much space than it deserved. And yet, I feel the need to defend it. Allow me to explain why. Continue reading “Vogue Empower My Choice: What the criticism actually did to feminism”

TEDxITMU talk by Sanjukta Basu

My TEDxITMU talk – Have we survived the rape and violence?

TEDxITMU

I was recently invited as a speaker at TEDxITMU, the TEDx event at the Institute of Technology and Management University, Gurgaon. I shared the stage with a range of very interesting speakers like, Actor Vipin Sharma (of Taare Zameen Par fame), Delhi FM station Hit 95’s popular RJ Suroshree Dasgupta, Jazz musician duo Adil Manuel & Vasundhara Vidalur, Babar Afzal Founder, KashmirINK, Artist Roop Chand and others. Here is the complete list of speakers. Continue reading “My TEDxITMU talk – Have we survived the rape and violence?”

I survived rape

Shashi Tharoor is right – Reveal rape victim’s name – Kudos to girl’s family for agreeing

Let’s admit there is a discomfort in the word ‘RAPE.’ Often during light coffee table discussions we would not even utter the word and instead would convey what we mean by gestures or by typing special characters. To me the discomfort is to such an extent that I was seriously pained by the famous ‘balatkar pe balatkar‘ scene from 3 Idiots. Continue reading “Shashi Tharoor is right – Reveal rape victim’s name – Kudos to girl’s family for agreeing”

I survived rape

That’s it, she died – but did I survive the rape?

The Delhi gang rape victim died in Singapore Hospital. She had one life, just one and now its lost. We can keep talking about rape and justice, means and methods, causes and reforms but for her and her family its ‘The End’ Continue reading “That’s it, she died – but did I survive the rape?”

lgbt-rights

Queer (LGBT) pride parade Hyderabad – Police denied permission

right to pride

Hyderabad Police has denied permission to carry on LGBT Pride Parade in Hyderabad. Every citizen in a democracy has the right to peaceful protest, and here we are not even talking about a protest, this is a Pride March. That one needs permission to be proud of one’s identity is weird enough, to deny permission is simply outrageous. It seems the denial is not final, more details on this would follow. Please keep an eye on this space. Meanwhile spread the word. Below is a public statement by activist Aditya Bondyopadhyay:

Continue reading “Queer (LGBT) pride parade Hyderabad – Police denied permission”

Pre marital sex with promise of marriage – Delhi high court calls it rape

DNA Reports:

The Delhi high court on Monday held that sex without marriage amounted to rape

The court rejected pre-arrest bail to a man who repeatedly had sex with a woman but refused to marry her even after their engagement.

The woman stayed with her fiancé, Nikhil Prasar, in Mumbai for a few days, “where they had fun, and then went to Delhi and stayed in a hotel where they had sex”.

When it came to fixing a date for marriage, however, Nikhil refused, on the grounds that he had learned that she belonged to a different caste.

He (judge) said it appears that the man did not intend to marry the woman and that was why he did not wait for sex even till his formal engagement with her.

If he were so orthodox and conservative that he broke the marriage owing to caste differences, he should not have hurried in for sexual intercourse before marriage, the justice said.

The court held that if it was not held as rape, it would “result in unscrupulous and mischievous persons taking undue advantage of innocent girls by promising marriage with them”.

Sexual intercourse before marriage amounts to rape or it will result in victimisation or exploitation of innocent girls, justice Jain said.

Sex without marriage is rape? In what mind can a judge make such comment?

Continue reading “Pre marital sex with promise of marriage – Delhi high court calls it rape”

Amnesty International asks countries to follow India’s example in Gay Rights

This may be a bit old but I have somehow missed it by far. Soon after the historic judgment of Delhi High Court last year which decriminalized homosexual realtionship amongst consenting adults, the international human rights organisation Amnesty International issued this statement asking remaining remaining countries to follow India’s example and de-criminalize homosexuality. To quote from the statement, The court’s ruling rejected every argument put forward by the government in defence of the law. It found that section 377, the law criminalizing homosexuality, reflected an understanding of sexual orientation that is “at odds with the current scientific and professional understanding”. … Continue reading Amnesty International asks countries to follow India’s example in Gay Rights

History is created today, Delhi High Court rules being Gay is no longer a crime in India

Writing this in hurry, couldn’t have waited. History have been created today in India, this morning Delhi High Court gave its judgment on the petition filed by Naz Foundation challenging the constitutionality of Section 377 of IPC which criminalizes all acts of oral and anal sex between individuals irrespective of age and consent. High Court ruled in favour of the petition and said, We declare that Section 377 IPC, insofar it criminalises consensual sexual acts of adults in private, is violative of Articles 21, 14 and 15 of the Constitution. The provisions of Section 377 IPC will continue to govern … Continue reading History is created today, Delhi High Court rules being Gay is no longer a crime in India

Bangalore Queer Pride March’09: A Report

Did anybody see a rainbow today on Bangalore sky? I did as we drove back from Town Hall, the place where the Bangalore Queer Pride Parade concluded and I thought how very symbolic.
Bangalore Queer Pride Parade 09. Photo Vinayak Das
Bangalore Queer Pride Parade, 09. Photo: Vinayak Das

Queer people in Bangalore, Delhi, Chennai and Bhubaneswar today celebrated their ‘being’ under a rainbow colored flag. Gays, lesbians, kothis, hijras, intersexs, transsexuals and straight people walked the streets in large numbers amidst busy traffic dancing, laughing giggling, posing for the numerous photographers…and mostly, being proud of whoever they were in their ‘weirdest’ state of being.

Continue reading “Bangalore Queer Pride March’09: A Report”

Queer Pride India 2009: Celebrations in all major cities

Greetings from the land of the Sinful Kamasutra’ said Prince Manvendra Singh Gohil while opening the Euro pride 2008 at Stockholm. (Video) But who is he?

He was one of the few Indians to be invited to the Oprah Winfrey show, was one of the candidates for Time Magazine’s World Top 100 Most influential People list in 2007, have been quoted and interviewed by respected magazines and news dailies from all over the world; he is one of the most prominent face in LGBT rights activism and HIV awareness activity; he hosts an annual cultural festival at his palace for homosexual artists to celebrate their talent and their being, yet he is someone who is hardly talked about on Indian mainstream media. A convenient silence, deafness and blindness prevail on us when it comes to homosexuality – but not any more.

I wrote about Prince Manvendra Singh on this space exactly a year ago on my post ‘Its time to stand up and stand tall’ where I said “only when the number of people identifying themselves as queer is large enough and the faces known enough will the society realize it is not something so unnatural after all. And this responsibility lies with LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender) people themselves to come out of their closet and be confident of their sexuality. It’s time to stand up and stand tall.”

And they did. In just one year the queer movement in India has grown by leaps and bounds. There are more popular culture celebrities who now openly support homosexuality, most vocal of them being Celina Jaitly who have called out for gay rights in India in her blog on Times of India. The last year or so saw movies like ‘Partner’, ‘Dostana’ which had both explicit and implicit homo-eroticism and gay rights advocacy. While our cinema and advertisement have always had depiction of male homosexuality albeit in a funny and derogatory manner, we have been terribly silent over female homosexuality. This also changed (very insignificantly) in the recent past, a certain Virgin Mobile TV commercial is the case in point, where a girl tells her father that she is not interested in going out with this boy from her class. The father gets all worried thinking she might turn out to be a lesbian and insisted she goes out with boys more.

  Continue reading “Queer Pride India 2009: Celebrations in all major cities”

PG – Mom dad please don’t read this

That was a PG rating for mom and dad coz they both are quite a fan of my blog.

These weird thoughts just came to mind, dunno from where – what is this obsession men have with BBWs? Ok wikipedia would inform you BBW = Big Beautiful Women, but c’mon we all know what it actually is ‘big breasted women.’ So why do men have this obsession for big boobs. No that’s a serious question.

Somebody explain this to me. Isn’t it true that a fat women would by default have a considerably big size (for lack of more decent words). Does that mean this popular interest men have for big bs (what? What did I say?) is in effect an interest in fat girls?

But last I checked fat = ugly. One thing men say, and I know it as a matter of fact, is this, “Oh! I don’t like skinny women but they should have a decent figure, should not look unhealthy.”

Now question is what are the chances of a girl with decent figure having big bs? Will she have it naturally or would she have to get some silicon. Also when you get those siliocon does it function normally? As in can you breast feed a child?

Talking about this fetish look what I found, Boobpedia. Surprises me so much to see what all things are the people of this world engage in. I mean boobpedia of all things. And if you visit one of the orkut communities man is it enlightenment or is it enlightenment. From Incest to pedophiles ask what is not there. People narrating stories of how they got fucked by their parents or raped their sisters. I wonder is it all for real? Do people really have such bizarre fetishes?

Continue reading “PG – Mom dad please don’t read this”

Nationwide Queer Pride March: An Historical event

Last week I wrote a piece on how its time for the queer people to stand up, stand tall and assert their rights. In this context the queer activism in India just witnessed a landmark event, the first ever nation wide Queer Pride March was concluded on Sunday, 29th June 2008. Thousands of gay, lesbians, bi-sexuals, transexuals and other non-heterosexual people in Delhi Bangalore and Kolkata came out on the streets to join the march which was “not a protest but a celebration”, as Leselie Esteves, member of the newly formed Delhi Queer Pride committee puts it. This was the … Continue reading Nationwide Queer Pride March: An Historical event

New posts on my political blog

There are two new posts on my political blog, This is my mind. “It’s time to stand up and Stand tall“ is about alternate sexuality. The main idea that I want to convey through the post is that the non heterosexual people, politically called the queer people should come out of their closet and assert their rights.   … Only if the number of people calling themselves queer is large enough and the faces known enough will the society realize it is not something so unnatural after all.  “What is wrong is preaching atheism, it’s a religion too” is motivated by the recent text … Continue reading New posts on my political blog

Capturing-the-Friedmans

Good truth v Bad truth: A case of incestuous relationship between Josef Fritzl and his daughter

A horror house, a dungeon with secret chambers, where lived in captivity a family for 24 long years. A tender girl child of 18 year was lured in there on a casual pretext of carrying some stuff, then she was … Continue reading Good truth v Bad truth: A case of incestuous relationship between Josef Fritzl and his daughter

Mr.Gay India

Mr. Gay contest 2008 results are out. India is not the winner. 33 year old Carlos Fabian Melia from Argentina is. However for the Indian gay community and other gender benders, Indian contestant, 26 year old Mumbai based model Zoltan Parag is no less than a winner. Zoltan may not have won the contest but he sure did made a lot of us proud. I admire Zolan’s guts to come out with his sexuality and to be the first Indian to participate any such contest given that he might well be booked under the criminal law of the country. Many … Continue reading Mr.Gay India

Billi Bachao Andolan

Breaking News. Parents in the Indian metropolis seen marching on the street with placards reading, ‘billi bachao’1 The main reason of protest is the emerging trends amongst their wards to feed billis with milk, whenever wherever they feel like. They often don’t let parents scrutinise the quality or source of the milk. Milk from unreliable sources are injurious to the social health of the billi and its kith and kin.   Their demand is the enactment of a law to establish a system of granting licence to feed the billi with milk. The said license can be granted by Government, Courts … Continue reading Billi Bachao Andolan

The others

No bisexuals in humans That, is more or less the crux of a post written by Sukumar which again is inspired by another post by Dumaketu. I appreciate the blogger’s guts to write about such topic (although I didn’t understand his post one bit), but OH MY GOD what a faulty presumption. I can’t even begin to write about it. I come across young men like Sukumar every now and then and wonder how could one ever bridge this gap between these two worlds…the hetero-normative world being oblivious to the other world which knows no labelling. There is no such … Continue reading The others

Conversation with mom

Conversation on Gtalk… (Note mom’s typing speed is one 100th of my speed, so I got edge over her while arguing, by the time she frames one argument and types it out I have said 5 more arguments. The conversation was in Bengali am giving the translated version) Me – Mom, when do you plan to come down to Bangalore? am planning to take a flat you can come after that and stay for some long time. Mom – Flat? have you seen already? how much would be the rent… Me – would be around 8-9K have not yet seen … Continue reading Conversation with mom

Flims of Desire:Sexuality and the Cinematic Imagination

I should have blogged about this film festival coming to Bangalore long time back. This should have been on priority list but for lack of company paid time on internet.   This awesome film festival is being arranged by organisations based in Bangalore and Delhi working on sexuality rights:  CREA (Creating Resources for Empowerment in  Action), The South and Southeast Asia Resource Centre on Sexuality, Good As You (GAY), Swabhava.   Films of Desire Bangalore aims to bring together documentary, feature length and experimental films that deal with issues related to sexuality, with a specific focus on issues related to lesbian, gay, … Continue reading Flims of Desire:Sexuality and the Cinematic Imagination

Do you have a sexual fantasy?

I happen to know this person through Yahoo Messenger who is married, is a father to a daughter, loves both of them truly but is looking for one night stands without having any strings attached. When asked why such weird desire he says coz he can’t ask his wife to fulfill his fantasies. I see a social problem in him. Sex is one of the biggest truth of nature after probably death. Nothing else is as certain as the desire and need for sex between humans, animals, plants and all other organisms. It comes so naturally to us that to … Continue reading Do you have a sexual fantasy?